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hug_machine ([personal profile] hug_machine) wrote2010-02-14 05:17 pm
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A woman looking thoughtful as an easter bunny, a pot of gold and candy canes float above.
Your Future - Fictionalized!

So you're thinking of becoming a Fictional Mascot.

In today's economy, job stability is a key factor in planning your future. As professionals representing the field of Fictional Mascotry, we can proudly state that we've not cut a single position for nearly two centuries. Indeed, demand for our services is growing in these uncertain times. In the last quarter alone, wishes for pots of gold at the end of rainbows saw an increase of 23.4%, requiring the most ambitious Leprachaun recruiting effort in over eighty years. Cupids the world over have been logging overtime as singles everywhere realize they'll never be able to afford that mortage alone. Indeed, as long as there are starry-eyed lovers and children with wiggly teeth, Fictional Mascotry will flourish.


A Place for You

When most people think fictional mascots, it is often the highly competitive career paths, such as Santa Clausology, that come to mind. Intimidated by the thought of eight years of study at North Pole University, most do not further consider exploring the field. While we always welcome highly qualified applicants to our Doctor Of Christmasology programs, Clausology is hardly the only career path within in our wide field. If your interest happens to be egg painting, reindeer grooming or even the nocturnal collection of baby teeth, we have a position for you! The only qualification is that you love working with people. Or scaring the pants off them.

Our Commitment to DiversityA crowd of diverse people.  Including a jack o lantern, Krampus, a tooth fairy and a large bunny!

Fictional Mascotry has long since been a forerunner in diversity --in this field, we have strong record of multicultural leadership. We come from all walks of life: men, women, rabbits and even anthropromorphized, candle-lit gourds. Whether you are jolly and white bearded, ginger headed and pointy eared, buck-toothed and cotton-tailed or simply an Eastern European demi-demon with a penchant for frightening children into behaving, we have a position for you.

Perks Galore
A veterinarian holding a rabbit and listening to it with a stethoscope.  Behind him is a poster for vaccinations for 'Seasonal Egg Flu'. In addition to job security, a career in Fictional Mascotry offers ample perks.
  • Generous vacation time. Many of our positions require only a 1-2 day work year.
  • Second to none health-plans. We are a leader in fay-based in-home dentistry.
  • An unlimited supply of of fun-sized candy bars, and fully razorblade-free candied apples!
  • Many positions include the use of a company vehicle, be it enchanted sleigh, cherub wings or a ghostly black horse appearing only after midnight upon the lonely roads of Sleepy Hollow.
Interested in further exploring opportunities in Fictional Mascotry?

Make an appointment with your career counseler today and allow our attached quiz predict what career path would be right for you!




This week for [livejournal.com profile] therealljidol , I was paired up with the...well, we all already know how awesome she is!  [livejournal.com profile] zia_narratora  !!
She'd love to give you a tour around Cupid College!

[identity profile] oneonthefence.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 11:38 pm (UTC)(link)
You guys had one of the BEST intersections this week, seriously. This made me laugh (mostly because some of it just seemed so true, despite the "fictional mascotry" part of it;) and I loved the descriptions. So very well done.

[identity profile] alephz.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 11:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Dude. Yes. Forever.

I'm totally gonna get my doctorate in Clausology.

But all the same, I'll get a minor in Halloweenery 'cause while my skillset is for the former, I completely adore the latter.

[identity profile] rattsu.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 11:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Seriously. This is the best intersection ever. You guys have the weirdest ideas!

[identity profile] drippedonpaper.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 12:19 am (UTC)(link)
Wow. I loved last week and I figured you could not top that. Yet I wasn't disappointed this week.

You are SO creative! I loved this!

[identity profile] comedychick.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 12:29 am (UTC)(link)
Many of our positions require only a 1-2 day work year.

OK, this makes me want a job there! (It's so true, though). I suppose I better not apply for a tooth fairy role. Easter bunny, maybe? The quiz suggests I should try out for Krampus, though. If only I liked to lay eggs...

[identity profile] kutiechick.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 12:55 am (UTC)(link)
THE QUIZ TOLD ME I SHOULD BE SANTA CLAUS - I TOTALLY AGREE!!!!!!!!!! <333

Super, super cute, cat!!! I loved this soooooooo much!

[identity profile] supremegoddess1.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 01:22 am (UTC)(link)
you guys are crack-tastically funny.

[identity profile] perhin.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 02:12 am (UTC)(link)
This is hilarious! ^_^

[identity profile] onda-bianca.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 04:15 am (UTC)(link)
Haha, this is hilarious...I want to work there!=)

[identity profile] beautyofgrey.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 04:34 am (UTC)(link)
Yay, I am on the path to being a Tooth Fairy!!!!!!!!

*dances around in glitter*

[identity profile] crimsonplum.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 05:48 am (UTC)(link)
This is all kinds of hee!

[identity profile] tamaraland.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 11:05 am (UTC)(link)
I just love you guys!
shadowwolf13: (Default)

[personal profile] shadowwolf13 2010-02-15 09:46 pm (UTC)(link)
*laugh* Another fantastic winner!

[identity profile] lawchicky.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 12:49 am (UTC)(link)
This is awesome. I wanna be a fictional mascot for a living!

[identity profile] roina-arwen.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 04:34 am (UTC)(link)
Apparently I should go to Cupid College. ;)

[identity profile] kittenboo.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 05:11 am (UTC)(link)
very creative joint entries! i love them!

[identity profile] markmade.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 06:57 am (UTC)(link)
Yes yes yes! Great job :)

[identity profile] alycewilson.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 07:52 am (UTC)(link)
I'm a Cupid. I knew that "Fuzzy Kittens" course looked good.

[identity profile] joeymichaels.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 09:38 am (UTC)(link)
I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I AM KRAMPUS! ARGHHH!

[identity profile] impoetry.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 09:32 pm (UTC)(link)
You guys are adorable. And brilliant. Brilliantly adorable. What a great job you both did this week working together!

[identity profile] hightekvagabond.livejournal.com 2010-02-17 04:27 am (UTC)(link)
_I_ wanna be a fictional mascot!

[identity profile] pixie117.livejournal.com 2010-02-18 03:02 am (UTC)(link)
Cute. I love what you guys came up with. Very creative!

[identity profile] twistersflower.livejournal.com 2010-02-18 03:54 am (UTC)(link)
This is absolutely hilarious!

[identity profile] baxaphobia.livejournal.com 2010-02-18 10:41 am (UTC)(link)
This is sooo funny and cute! hahaha.

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