(no subject)

[hug_machine]

THE INTERNET'S LAMENT




Hey, you kids on Facebook! Yo, you teens on Twitter!
And anybody else with Roomba-iPhone babysitters!

You text and you chat 'till your thumbs get creaky,
Your eyes bug out and your brain goes squeaky.

Youtube's down for maintenance and Gmail's just plain out.
Do your teeth get to grinding? Does your hair pull straight out?

Well, hush up with your whining, and take heed of this ol' vet.
No horrors of a war long past, this is about the internet.

I braved the streets of SouthBayou (/Pier/9092/SpockFan.html)
Armed with nothing but my AOL and my trusty Packard-Bell.

Every morning I awoke to shrill and beeping midis
Embedded in the background of the wretched Geocities.

Stick figures donning hard hats, "Under Construction!" signs,
Guestbooks, counters, webrings (THIS SITE RULES NOW VISIT MINE!)

Lime green text and chartreuse backgrounds, let's add a blink tag here!
You load a page and hold your breath, half in awe and half in fear.

Dancing hamsters, dancing Jesus and dancing babies too.
Animated gifs can do some awful things to you.

They haunt my dreams, the early memes: Mr. T and I KISS YOU!!!!
I close my eyes and find that all my base belongs to you.

56k was the best, way back in those old days
Downloading files, awful --up the hill both ways!

Now newer days have come bringing Wifi, Bluetooth and 3Gs
All that's left of Geocities? Shuttered sites 'n tacky memories.

So next time your dear MySpace or LJ 404's?
Remember for a moment the words of this ol' web dino.

And as you gaze from your high rise on Intertubes Blvd and Lolcat Drive
Be thankful for your Web 2.0, as it wasn't always so
And remember poor Geocities which was barely Web .5!








1994-2009


HTML Hit Counter

This eye-burnery brought to you by therealljidol. I'm sorrrrry! XD



Header contains three under construction signs and a bar with animated flowers and a hummingbird. The title of the poem is in large purple text. Below the poem, there is another bar of flowers and hummingbirds, a spinning RIP sign and the Geocities logo. Below that, there is an old skool led webpage counter. Again, I'm sorrrry! XD

Comments

[comedychick.livejournal.com]

Ahahahahahahaha, hilarious and awesome! You are so much fun, Cat :D

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Mostly hilarious 'cause I accidentally wrote 1999 instead of 2009 at first...

XDDD

SO MUCH READING TO DO, EEEEE!

[lovewas.livejournal.com]

Brilliant!

Reminded me of this (http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbsite/).

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Heehee! TY! XD

[wendelah1]

I miss it already. What a lovely tribute.

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Me too! *prolly will spend HOURS on archive.org*

[stormkitty.livejournal.com]

Love it! RIP Geocities!

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Awh, TY!

~if only geocities could hear us now~

[ladymako71.livejournal.com]

Ah, so true...so true. LULZ

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

I figured lotsa us would be able to relate! XD

[zia-narratora.livejournal.com]

CAT YOU ARE A GENIUS OF GENIUSY PROPORTIONS.

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

ljkshjd

no, YOU!

I can't wait to tell everybody I knew you before you were a world-wide famous cartoonist. :3

[liret.livejournal.com]

I had my first webpage on Geocities. It was an Animorphs fansite. Oh, the eyeburn.

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

D'awwh, Animorphs!

memmmmories~

[lunylucy.livejournal.com]

Can I put this on metaquotes? :)

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

xfiojusdf Whoaaa!

Hokay! XD

[pixie117.livejournal.com]

LOVED this! I can totally related and have been there as far as geocities go myself. I remember dial up and waiting to connect, hoping it would finally connect sometime (our dialup lines often got "busy" at peak times). Oh man, can I really relate to this!

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

B'awwwh, that eeeekkkkkkrrrrrbeeeeeeegghghghgh (for this is my impression of a dial-up tone) brings me right back...

[darknyss.livejournal.com]

Oh Geocities, my very first page was there. And it was awesome and had awesome spinning/under construction/midi things indeed.
*wipes away tear* RIP.

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

XD We'll have to make some blinky gifs in memory! ♥

[holdouttrout.livejournal.com]

*sniffs* Thank you. This was beautiful.

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

D'awwh, TY!

I miss it already. Even if it gave me a headache lots of the time.

[twilight-angel.livejournal.com]

Here from Metaquotes. Hilarious and awesome! Almost made me nostalgic for my young, carefree days going from one Geocities site to another. (Almost.) Goodbye, dear Geocities!

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Eee, hello!

I still can't believe I got metaquoted...XD

We'll remember you forever, oh geocities!

[banyangirl1832.livejournal.com]

LMAO. This is brilliant, seriously.

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

XD TY!

I can't remember last time I had to rhyme so much. XD

[bigdoug.livejournal.com]

Awwwwww FUCK... half my livejournal icons were on that fricking geocities... the fucks could have at least let me know it was closing or sent me my shit in a zip file.... (*hopes against hope that he has backups...*)

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Awwwh...hopefully you can find 'em on archive.org again!

[shadowwolf13]

A poem I can actually enjoy, those are rare! Awesome job!

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

XD I was a tad nervous about it from what I've heard about poems on therealljidol but I just couldn't resist!

[dharmavati.livejournal.com]

Cat, this is AMAZING! *sniff*

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

The cheesy flashing gifs will live on in our hearts! XD

[viagra.livejournal.com]

Awesome!!! I try to block out my dial-up days, but it's kind of fun to look back on.

Also, this is the one and only time that Comic Sans was used appropriately.

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

XD I dunno when I last used comic sans, but I'm pretty sure it was before 2001. >>;

[krysti-ryou.livejournal.com]

That's sooo cute!! I still remember learning html as a kid from some funky chickens site, and how it was one 's' away from a nasty site, so I had to be very careful each time I typed in the address. I don't know why I forgot to bookmark it- maybe because I was too young? Basically I was raised on the internet, haha, so I have all these childhood fond memories of it. :)

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Bwahahaa...that is hilarious and cute.

But then, I remember trying to save whole webpages before I learned how to bookmark. XD

[cacophonesque.livejournal.com]

Good times. Good times.

I remember how exciting that beeping crackle sound of that dial-up modem was.

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Hehehe, it *was* exciting --a portal to a whole new world! I wish high speed connections did that every once in a while!

[kutiechick.livejournal.com]

THIS. Amaaaaaaaaaazing! :D

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Hehe, there are plenty 'o shaky rhymes, though. But TY! XD

[sunnyrea.livejournal.com]

Katie showed me this, I bow to you.

We won't miss you geocities. God those colors were so awful!

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Yessss --sometimes I'd hafta copy and paste geocities website text into wordpad just to be able to read it!

[onda-bianca.livejournal.com]

Haha, this entry brings the awesome to the possom. Great job!:)

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

Possoms don't need much help with awesome, though!

XD TY!

[kiwiria.livejournal.com]

Usually I'm no big fan of poetry, but this made me laugh out loud.

As a fellow internet geezer (I first came online in 1992), I salute you!

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

XD Somebody's gotta tell these kiddos what it was like back then!

[tamaraland.livejournal.com]

Hilarious!

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

XD TY!

[kittenboo.livejournal.com]

That was awesome! I had no idea geocities was dead, I remember cobbling together a first webpage on there and on angelfire.

[hug-machine.livejournal.com]

D'awwh, I remember Angelfire, too! And Tripod. Zounds, I wonder if they are still around...