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SIX ORDINARY HOUSEHOLD USES FOR UNICORNS
By Mythological Mimi


Dear Mythological Mimi-

Not long ago, my dear Great Aunt Betty passed away. While I wasn't particularly close to her, we did share a love of rainbows, puppies and sparkles. I assume this commonality was behind her reasoning to will me her beloved collection of unicorns. However, I find myself completely at a loss when it comes to what to do with them. I don't have any flaxen haired maidens at hand, nor any honorable knights searching for quest. I'm completely at a loss! Should I bite the bullet and toss them in the thrift shop bin?

Nonplussed in Nantucket

Dear Nonplussed,

Unicorns, long since known for a top notch source of antidotes, aphrodisiacs, and dragon defense have sometimes been considered quaint, outmoded or even imaginary in today's world. Well...bah on them! Here, I have collected just a few modern and everyday uses for unicorns:

an image of a pink unicorn at a carnival with rings being tossed onto its horn


Ring Toss!

a girl with cowboy boots and a cowboy hat flying a unicorn over a balding boss man, who looks very impressed and has stars in his eyes


Impressing your boss!

a unicorn in a martini glass with a green olive impaled on its horn


Cocktail Pick!

the same girl riding the unicorn but this time an old starry eyed lady is watching


Impressing your grandma!

a unicorn underwater wearing a narwhal fin while a boat of whale watchers point from a ship


Narwhal impersonation!

the same girl riding a unicorn but this time a starry eyed yellow dog is watching


Impressing your dog!

Readers with more helpful unicorn tips may write (delivered by owl, fairy or intergalactic starcraft only please!) to:

Mythological Mimi
777 Cottingley Way
Ham-on-Rye, Opensmouth 12345

This post brought to you by [livejournal.com profile] therealljidol!

Date: 2010-03-24 11:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zia-narratora.livejournal.com
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH CAT. SO MUCH.

Date: 2010-03-26 03:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
*noms your brain*

*noms your brain foreverrrrr*

...tastes like blueberries. >>;

Date: 2010-03-24 11:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] liret.livejournal.com
I was totally worried you wouldn't make it!

If I had a unicorn, I would make her pretend to be a narwhal.

Date: 2010-03-26 03:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
Me too!

On both bits! XD

Date: 2010-03-24 11:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] baxaphobia.livejournal.com
Haha. Very cute!

Date: 2010-03-26 03:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
D'awwwh, TY! Cuteness achievement pretty much always one of my goals!

Date: 2010-03-25 12:40 am (UTC)
musyc: Silver flute resting diagonally across sheet music (Default)
From: [personal profile] musyc
OH EM GEE, this was fantastic. I love your uses for unicorns! XD

Date: 2010-03-26 03:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
Many people forget how versatile they are! XD

Date: 2010-03-25 01:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oneonthefence.livejournal.com
I have SO much love for this :)

Date: 2010-03-26 03:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
We all need a little unicorn in our day! XD

Date: 2010-03-25 02:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fourzoas.livejournal.com
I need one of those cocktail picks!

Date: 2010-03-26 03:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
They are highly useful! And fashionable!

Date: 2010-03-25 03:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beautyofgrey.livejournal.com
SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.


EEEE.

I have to confess, I still have my unicorn collection from when I was a girl. They've been wrapped in paper for a while, but OUT THEY MUST FLY.

Date: 2010-03-26 03:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
*stores your SQUEE in a jar for later*

XD

And YES for girlie unicorn collections!

Date: 2010-03-25 03:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lawchicky.livejournal.com
Hee, unicorns!

Date: 2010-03-26 03:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
You can never go wrong with Unicorn Ring Toss!

Date: 2010-03-25 03:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] comedychick.livejournal.com
This was adorable! I think the cocktail Pick and impersonating a narwhal were my favourite interpretations XD

Date: 2010-03-26 03:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
XDD Those were my favorites too! I loved drawing the unicorn all upside-down like with the olive on its horn!

Date: 2010-03-25 04:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] karmasoup.livejournal.com
There's a lot of impressing that goes in with unicorns, apparently. ;)

Date: 2010-03-26 03:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
Why of course! Best use for them evar!

Date: 2010-03-25 03:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sra33.livejournal.com
I want to impress my dog!!! Can I get a unicorn please?!

Date: 2010-03-26 03:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
We've got a few in stock, would you prefer a sunset golden, a tutu pink or a sorbet rainbow? XD

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] sra33.livejournal.com - Date: 2010-03-26 12:04 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2010-03-25 03:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] onda-bianca.livejournal.com
Haha, how fun!:)

Date: 2010-03-26 03:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
XD It was!

Date: 2010-03-25 05:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chocolatrouge.livejournal.com
I woke up bitter this morning because I have only one more day of studying before taking a comprehensive exam that determines whether I graduate in my program in May.

After reading this on my friends' list, my mood is amazingly uplifted.

Hug_Machine=cure for whatever ails you. ; )

Date: 2010-03-26 03:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
Oh gosh, this was the sweetest comment ever...I'm glad it helped sweeten your bitter-y day! I bet you did great on your exams! You're a brilliant lady, you are! ♥

Date: 2010-03-26 12:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] similiesslip.livejournal.com
This was so cute:)

I like the ring toss and cocktail ones especially:)

Date: 2010-03-26 03:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
The best part is that unicorn is totally loving being a ring toss apparatus!

Date: 2010-03-26 02:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] roina-arwen.livejournal.com
Very cute! My icon approves of this post. =)

Date: 2010-03-27 08:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
ZOMG That is an amazing coincidence! XD It's adorable! Where is it from?

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] roina-arwen.livejournal.com - Date: 2010-03-28 05:39 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2010-03-26 08:27 pm (UTC)
shadowwolf13: (Default)
From: [personal profile] shadowwolf13
*iz ded of cute*
Edited Date: 2010-03-26 08:27 pm (UTC)

Date: 2010-03-27 08:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
Nuuu! Don't be dead! *throws a lifesaver at you*

XD

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] shadowwolf13 - Date: 2010-03-27 10:50 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2010-03-26 09:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] alycewilson.livejournal.com
You are so silly. Your entries always make me smile.

Date: 2010-03-27 08:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
I aim to please! Specially if we're aiming at a unicorn horn with at a ringtoss. XD

Date: 2010-03-26 11:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cacophonesque.livejournal.com
Now I want a cocktail...

And to go on a narwhal watch.

Date: 2010-03-27 08:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
Me too! At the same time!

Date: 2010-03-26 11:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] emo-snal.livejournal.com
narwhal impersonation!!


edited for utter fail at commenting
Edited Date: 2010-03-26 11:51 pm (UTC)

Date: 2010-03-27 08:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
But now I wanna see a narwhal impersonating a unicorn! XD

Date: 2010-03-27 01:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] imafarmgirl.livejournal.com
This was different. I love the uses for unicorns.

Date: 2010-03-27 08:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
They are practically a household staple!

Date: 2010-03-27 04:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] markmade.livejournal.com
Adorable and awesome :D

Date: 2010-03-27 08:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
I aims to please! *salutes*

Date: 2010-03-27 09:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joeymichaels.livejournal.com
Extra hell yeah points for bringing back Narwhals back to LJI.

Date: 2010-03-27 08:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
They shoulda never left!

Date: 2010-03-27 05:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pixie117.livejournal.com
That is just so cute!

Date: 2010-03-27 08:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
Thankie! I aim for teh cutes!

Date: 2010-03-27 06:15 pm (UTC)
connie: (Default)
From: [personal profile] connie
Aww, the illustrations here are so cute! My favorites are ring toss and cocktail pick.

Date: 2010-03-27 08:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hug-machine.livejournal.com
Unicorns are the best subjects for illustrat-ery!

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